Lesson 4
Learning About Myself
My experience has caused me to have a strong opinion that training our children in service is crucial to the growth of their faith and is a key factor in seeing them remain in the Lord's church as they grow into adulthood. Teaching children early that they are able to give and contribute to the family and the Kingdom creates a servant's heart. It also develops good self esteem and prevents an entitled attitude. The selfish nature of children is combated by the instruction that it is more blessed to give than to receive. This first has to be modeled to the children in our lives as parents. They must see us serving willingly and joyfully. And when the children are included in the family serving, they learn that they are a vital part of the family. Our children are empowered to develop the desire to continue to serve independent of our instruction to do so.
This effort can be thwarted when we as moms don't feel we have anything to offer. When we are not aware of the gifts we have or when we feel our gifts are not as important as others, our children may be missing out on this most important lesson.
The scripture states that the Son of Man did not come into the world to be served but to serve. His entire existence was to serve us. On the night before He was arrested, Jesus gave a humble example of service as He washed the disciple's feet. His instruction was to go and do the same. We are saved by faith in Christ Jesus but the scriptures also teach that we are saved for good works. Revelation uses the imagery that the white robes we spiritually wear are indeed the "righteous acts of the saints." It is clear that a follower of Jesus is to be a servant.
It is our duty as a follower of Christ to serve and to teach our children to do the same. But in a world that is so "me" focused, how can we accomplish this? Our culture can be cut throat, prideful, and competitive. We tend to compare ourselves to others and as a result we may not have a good feeling about ourselves or what we can offer.
In this lesson we are going to take an honest look at ourselves to learn what gifts God has given to us and to evaluate how well we are using those gifts to glorify the Lord and train our children.
Romans 12: 6-8
"We have different gifts according to the grace given us. If one's gift is prophecy, let him use it in proportion to his faith; if it is serving, let him serve; if it is teaching, let him teach; if it is encouraging, let him encourage; if it is giving, let him give generously; if it is leading, let him lead with diligence; if it is showing mercy, let him do it cheerfully."
In Matthew 25 we see the parable of the talents. Three servants were entrusted with various amounts of money according to their ability. When the master returned to the servants he evaluated what the servants had done with their gift. Two invested their gifts to gain more. One servant hid the gift and did not use it or try to increase the value of the gift. The master was pleased only with the servants who used the gifts that were given. His anger was quite severe toward the one who did not even try to use the gift he was given. The master took the gift from the one who hid it and gave it to the ones who used their gifts.
There are some things to notice about this story.
1.) All were given something according to their ability. But all the gifts were not the same. The type of gift or the amount of the gift was not important.
2.) The ones who used their gift did increase the value of the gift but how it was used was not important, only that it was used for the master's benefit and was increased.
3.) The only displeasure came when the gift was not used at all.
The parable states in verse 29
"For everyone who has will be given more and he will have an abundance. But the one who does not have, even what he has will be taken away from him."
It is humbling to think that unused gifts may result in things being taken away. My opinion is that one consequence of not purposely using the gifts God has given us will be loosing the opportunity to teach our children to be servants in the Lord's kingdom. That may hinder your own spiritual growth and the growth of your children. It may even keep them from salvation.
1 Peter 4:10 "As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another as good stewards of God's varied grace."
1 Corinthians 12: 4-6 "Now there are varieties of gifts but the same spirit; and there are varieties of service, but the same Lord; and there are varieties of activities but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone."
Colossians 3: 23-24 "Whatever you do, work heartily as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ."
So, what are you good at? I must take you back to our first lesson. We must have the right mindset! We may think that we are not able to do the "big" churchy things like preaching or teaching so we don't think we have anything to give
Again, I ask, what are you good at?
Here are some gifts to consider:
teaching
caregiving
encouraging
giving generously
mercy giving
administrating
hospitality giving
helping
praying
building
Whatever the gift, our goal is to use it generously and increase in the gift giving! We must see what we do as doing it unto the Lord. That might change our attitude as we serve.There are a few things to consider as we work on our mindset about serving.
1.) Resist the temptation to compare you gifts with others. In doing so we risk one of two things. First we may think we are a better servant if we do more than others. And secondly, we may feel insignificant if we do less. God's emphasis in on using what we have and increasing. It is not a competition. All servants are working together to advance the kingdom. Each servant is of equal value!
2.) Resist the urge to complain about serving. This indicates a poor mindset and hinders your example to your children. Instead, speak positively about how it pleases God to give and serve others.
3.) Trust that the promise of God will become evident that you "reap what you sow." It will not be long before the joy of giving will bless you and your children and they will be finding ways on their own to serve others. You will see purpose and joy and a lovely spirit develop in your children as their selfish nature will fade away.
STUDY QUESTIONS
1. What are you good at?
2. What is your attitude about serving?
3. How can you be more intentional about training your children to serve with a joyful attitude?
4. Do you praise your children when they legitimately serve unselfishly?
5. Where would you like to serve more for Christ?
6. What are ways you have found to encourage a giving spirit among your family?