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Lesson 2
Accepting God's Forgivness for Myself

Psalm 103: 12

"As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us."

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In the book, "Own your past, change your future" by Dr John Delony, he states,"Forgiveness is a bold and brave display of power."

I have really taken time to chew on that.  I certainly can agree that God, through the death and resurrection of Jesus displayed an 

amazing power in that He provided a way for all to be forgiven.

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Michael 7: 18-19

"Who is a God like You?  Who pardons iniquity and passes over the transgression of the remnant of His inheritance - who does not retain His anger forever because He delights in loving devotion.  He will again have compassion on us.  He will vanquish our iniquities.  You will cast out all our sins into the depth of the sea."

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God promises that, "He will remember them no more."

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Psalm 32:5

"I will confess my transgressions to the Lord and You will forgive the guilt of my sin."

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Not only does the power of God forgive the acts of our sins but He forgives the guilt of our sins.  We are no longer held accountable for the penalty of our sins.  There may be consequences we have to live with but guilt should not be one of them.  We may tend, though, to continue to feel guilty for all our wrong doings.  We sometimes hold on to the soul crushing feelings of guilt and shame even when God says it is no more.  When we don't accept the forgiveness of God we are saying that Christ's blood shed on the cross is not powerful enough to forgive.

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And when someone hurts us, we can hold  on to the pain and trauma of that sin against us.  It is sometimes very difficult to lay down those heavy feelings that hinder our best life.  Guilt and bitterness can poison your soul.

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Isaiah 55:6-9

"Seek the Lord while He may be found; call on Him while He is near.  Let the wicked man forsake his own way and the unrighteous man his own thoughts; let him return to the Lord that He may have compassion, and to our God for He will freely pardon.  For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways." declares the Lord. "For the heavens are higher than the earth, so My ways are higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts."

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God's ways are so much higher than ours and it is a struggle to fight against our own nature.  We can find it unreasonable to accept God's forgiveness and move forward in joy.  It can also be just as hard to forgive as God has forgiven us.  Sin holds us captive and bitterness can create its own bondage.   The Bible urges us to avoid such chains.

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Eph. 4:31-32

"Get rid of bitterness, rage and anger, outcry and slander, along with every form of malice.  Be kind and tenderhearted to one another, forgiving each other just as in Christ, God forgave you."

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So when I think back to Dr. Delony's quote, I have to see how our act of accepting God's forgiveness and forgiving others is truly a "bold and brave display of power."  Not our power, but the power of the Holy Spirit living within us.  This act has so much power to defuse difficulty and free us to have joyful contentment in our lives.  And since God's ways are higher than ours it also demonstrates to the world the power of God and flies in the face of worldly wisdom.

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Prov. 17: 19

"Whoever would foster love covers over an offense but whoever repeats a matter separates close friends."

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Holding on to and repeating sin that God has already forgiven is crippling emotionally and spiritually.  Somehow we think that we don't deserve to move forward with joy after we have sinned but that is not how God sees it.  Forgiveness is freeing!  As moms we will surely make plenty of mistakes but God forgives all.  A house that holds forgiveness as a high priority will flourish.

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TIPS FOR TEACHING A FORGIVING SPIRIT

 

1) Practice saying words like, "I am sorry! Will you forgive me?"

                                                  "I choose to forgive you."

Teach children that both parties in a conflict where one sins against another have choices to make.

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2) Be mindful and grateful for God's forgiveness.  Remind yourself often that God has blotted out ALL of your sin.

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3) Be careful how you speak about people who have hurt you.  Even if you are still processing your pain and situation, don't model an angry and bitter spirit in front of your family.

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4) Try to seek understanding about why someone might act in a hurtful way toward you.  Talk openly about how everyone deals with things we may have no clue about.  Model a compassionate and gracious attitude.

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5) Work on self control in your thought processes.  Take every negative and bitter thought captive to the obedience of Christ.  

2Cor. 10 :5.

Work on matching thoughts with truth. Meditate on truth.

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If this is an area in which you struggle, share with a trusted friend and have a prayer partner to help you overcome.

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STUDY QUESTIONS

1) Identify any areas in your life where you may be harboring feelings of guilt and shame over sins that God has forgiven.  Acknowledge that God is powerful enough to forgive anything.  Then live the truth that you are forgiven.

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2) Do you find forgiving others to be easy or difficult?

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3) Where can you be better in modeling grace and forgiveness in your home?

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4) Do you find yourself keeping records of wrong doings against you?

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5) How do you feel about Matt. 5:44?

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"...Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven.  He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.  If you love those who love you, what reward will you get?  Do not even the tax collectors do the same?  And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same?"

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WOMEN’S ROLES

Lesson 1

“ROLES, NOT IDENTITY”

 

As we look at the creation story in Genesis, we see that God was satisfied with each day of His handiwork.  We see the phrase “And God saw that it was good” over and over.  On the sixth day God said:

 

“Let us make man in Our image, after Our likeness”  “So God created man in His own image.”

 

God ordained man to rule over creation.  The Bible says that male and female, He created them.  And God said it was not only good but “VERY good”

 

In Genesis 2:18 God indicates the first thing that He said was not good during the seven days of creation.  And that was, it was not good for man to be alone.  In all of creation, the birds of the air and the fish of the sea and the beasts fo the land, there was not found a suitable helper for man.

 

“So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep, and while he slept she took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the area with flesh.  And from that rib that the Lord God had taken from the man, He made a woman and brought her to him.” Gen. 2: 21 and 22

 

Woman was created to be a “suitable helper”.  The King James Bible uses the term “Help Meet”  What does that mean?

 

As we look at scriptures that talk about the role of women, we can be thrust into so many emotions.  These scriptures can be hard to swallow.  But I ask the question, Are the scriptures difficult or is it my heart that is not soft enough to meditate on these verses? Do I have preconceived ideas, negative past experiences, or selfish, self preserving defenses that go up immediately as I look upon such ideas?

 

In Elyse Fitzpatrick’s book entitled, “Helper by Design”  She says this about handling such scriptures as she started the project of writing her book:

 

“Honestly, there were days I strongly considered forsaking the whole project.  Then, when by God’s mercy, I once again regained forward motion, I felt I was walking in the dark…trying to learn what I just tripped over, picking up a stone, holding it…examining it, experiencing it.  What does the heat of this rock mean?  Is it really blistering hot or is it just that my hands are so cold?  Is it genuinely sharp?  Does it have to cut, or am I hanging on to it too tightly or holding it in the wrong places?”

 

I believe that as we look at what God instructs, it does not have to sting. If we open our heart to God’s instructions we will see something powerful and beautiful.

 

Let’s remember a few things before we begin.

 

  1. We are God’s beloved children.  (Eph. 5:1)

  2. Everything God instructs is for our own good and pleasure. (Jer. 29:11)

  3. God longs to bless us and give us the desires of our hearts. (2 Chron. 16:9)(Psalm 37:4)

  4. We can only control ourselves. (Phil. 2:12-13 )

 

As women we fill many roles.   We are daughters and sisters. We may choose to marry taking on the role of helper and wife.  We may have children taking on the role of mother.  We may choose roles like teacher, health care provider, coach, boss of a company, etc.

We must remember that no matter the roles we fill,  they are not our identity.

Our identity is CHILD OF GOD CREATED IN HIS IMAGE.  This is the main point I want to get across in this lesson.  And I believe that if we put this truth into our hearts it will help us accept the role of helper to our husband. It will help us embrace the role in a different light.

 

As a christian woman, our goal in life is to reflect Christ in all we do.  To be His hands and feet.  We seek to glorify God with the work of our hands and to glorify and imitate God within any role we fill.

 

Elyse Fitzpatrick suggests that we can gain greater understanding of what a helper does if we imitate our Heavenly Father who is our great helper.

 

 

IN WHAT WAYS IS GOD OUR HELPER?

 

God strengthens-

Psalm 54:4 - “Behold, God is my helper:  The Lord is of them that uphold my soul.”

 

Isa. 41:10 - “Don’t be afraid, for I am with you.  Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God.  I will strengthen you and help you.  I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.”

 

Psalm 46:1 - “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in time of trouble.”

 

 

God sustains-

 

Isa. 46:4 - “I will be your God throughout your lifetime- Until your hair is white with age.  I made you and I will care for you.  I will cary you along and I will save you.”

 

God comforts-

 

2 Cor 1 : 3-4 “…God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort.  He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others….”

 

God protects-

 

2 Thes. 3:3 - “…The Lord is faithful; He will strengthen you and guard you from the evil one.”

 

 

We can always count on God to hold to his promises.  So, in that light let’s answer these questions.

 

  1. Can our husband always count on us?

  2. How can we strengthen our husband?

  3. How can we help sustain him?

  4. What is the best way to comfort our husband?

  5. How can we protect our husband?

  6. How do we treat our husband in a time of trouble?

 

We all know that the world is a tough place.  As we go out to work and purchase and live our lives we can be knocked down in many ways.  I want our home and my presence to be a source of strength, comfort and protection to my husband and family.  I want my husband to want to come home because it is the place where he feels safe, secure, respected and a respite from the world.  As wives, we have the power to create an atmosphere that fosters those characteristics.

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Last night Frank came home and to my surprise he said to me, “ My eyes were really opened today.”  He had been out plowing snow for 13 hours. This caught my attention. “ I just want to thank you for being the kind of woman that you are.”  Ok. That was nice. Why was he compelled to say this?  Apparently he had witnessed some conversations where he was shocked at how the man in those conversations was being spoken to.  He heard great disrespect, ungratefulness, and ugliness.  He said he could not imagine being spoken to in the manner he had heard.  I said thank you and asked, “ So my nagging isn’t so bad?”

He laughed and said,”Bring it on!”

I love my husband with all my heart and was so thankful he sees me as a source of strength, comfort and a safe haven from the world.  I am not perfect by any means but I only want my husband to thrive in our lives and family.

 

 

 

 

Being a helper to our husband goes far deeper than just having dinner ready at a certain time.  It is not a lesser role.  It does not devalue us.  If anything it is a beautiful thing when we show the love that God shows. It is tremendously powerful when we “build our house”.  We want good things for the man we love.

 

As parents it is a wonderful gift to give our children; showing them how to love and honor another human being and to strive for what is good in another person’s life.

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